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Are you there God? It’s me, Mar-Chad

April 3, 2009

Dear God,

Where does the sidewalk end? Is it where the wild things are?
Would the Lorax have saved The Giving Tree?
Why did you have to call it a training bra? I felt like I was missing something vital for gym class.
If someone has Tiger Eyes, shouldn’t we be calling a priest?
What would Ramona Quimby, age 70, be able to eat? Would she be gumming down some SuperFudge?
Why visit an Island of Blue Dolphins when you can run nekkid in The Blue Lagoon?

Why are you bringing V back? Did we not learn anything from The Bionic Woman? And they better not be eating the rats from NIMH!
Why is Miss Universe allowed to speak? Quien es, es la nina? Who’s that girl?

Who do you blame when your kid is a brat?
Pampered and spoiled like a Siamese cat
Blaming the kids is a lie and a shame
You know exactly who’s to blame…the mother and the father…

Papa, can you help me not be frightened? Looking at the stars I seem to see a million eyes…which ones are yours?

Turn around, bright eyes

Cause here’s where the story ends.

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